Dirty Talk Thursday – The Return

This is going to be a little shorter than most Dirty Talk Thursday posts, but I gotta get back into the swing of regular posting again. Plus, I want to do more than just tease future posts with vague assed, “hey, there’s gunna be a thing!” threats. So today, I’m going to share some quick notes on another crossing of two of my major traits – 1) Big ol’ Nerd & 2) Big ol’ Perv.

I’ve been compiling sex stats again.

Yes.

There will be another sweet-assed-chart.

Once again, the chart isn’t exactly going to be Scientific. On the other hand, at least this time I have a bit more data to cross reference. The data I have been collecting has been all about hooking up, what goes into making a hookup happen, and the information that I have observed that women want before hooking up.

It may be a while before that goes up, though, for two major reasons. The first is sample size. I need more instances to feel good about statistically declaring that, “So… this is a thing.” This has so far involved me going through as many of my previous attempts at hookups, successful and otherwise, as possible and doing some data entry. Emails, gChats, AOL IMs, onlinebootycall.com messages, match.com things, etc. That won’t be enough data, either, so I’ve also started just tossing out hookup invites/emails/craigslistings just to get more info, even though I’m in kind of a weird place right now and don’t think I’d act on any hits, if we’re just going to be clinical and call them that. and yeah, I’ll pro’lly get around to talking about that weird place I’m in another time. just not now.

I’m going through all of the hookup attempts, pulling all of the relevant info that I can, and plugging it all into a fairly robust spreadsheet. It’s robust enough that I may need to brush up on pivot tables again. I’m even trying to include stats on when something I said or did probably influenced what she said or did and would skew results. For instance, one of the stats is whether or not the girl asked me about any specific sex acts. I think it would be interesting to know how common that happens, but I think it is a more interesting stat if it was asking independently of influence. So if she asks me if I like reverse cowgirl, that gets tallied. But if she asked that following me asking her if she likes giving handjobs, that also gets tallied and would count against her answer in this instance in a weighted statistic. If she wants to know how I feel about “tango foxtrot” but I first asked her if she had any fetishes, same deal. But if we’ve only done the basic intros and preliminary planning and she’s all, “So my last boyfriend was really into anal, which is weird… I mean, unless you’re into it… I mean we could give it a… Just for fun..?” That counts.

I’ll get more into the details of the data I’m collecting when I actually out the results out there. Maybe I’ll drop some thoughts as I get closet to that happening in the mean time. The other thing that will take time is actually going through my data, plotting it, and seeing if I can pull some trends or whatever. To me, the raw data is very interesting. However, the most interesting parts come from the trending, comparisons, and extrapolations.

On that note, I actually already have a trend that I feel fairly comfortable sharing. You know how damn near every study about female sexual preferences and attraction ever always say that cock size doesn’t matter? Well, I’m pretty sure they are all full of shit. Up to this point with over 200 instances (and no, I have not hooked up with even a fraction of those instances), far and away the most frequently, uninfluenced, not-prompted questions that I get asked are direct inquiries about the size of my Johnson. I get asked that so often and from so many different types of women that if it doesn’t matter, than I don’t understand things.

That being said, I wouldn’t say that they are looking for the giant trouser snakes that every porno and frat guy would have us believe we need to have. Hell, some even seem to prefer smaller than the (probably also bullshit) self-reported average of six to seven inches. But I don’t think there is a trend towards a specific size. In fact, I think most end up resulting in wanting a picture of the thing. Which, by the way, sending a dick pic… Pretty weird sensation.

Like I said, we’ll see what the final results are. That one just stuck out to me. Probably because even though I am now completely comfortable with my own “fun sized” package these days, I seem to unwittingly be amount the huge statistic of men that are obsessed with the dimensions of their own disaster area. Yeah. And you chicks thought you had body image problems. Ours could actually result in functional issues.

tl;dr – Dirty Talk Thursday is back; I’m collecting a big pile of sex stats; broads totally care about cock size… I think.

Oh, and another thing – not a lot of single women live alone, according to my stats. I’d like to cross that with some census info to see if I maybe the type of women I’m encountering are relatively unique and thus skewing results no matter what.

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