At the request of a friend (actually, I asked her for a topic and this was her weird-assed response), today I’m going to talk about nipples. Dude nipples. The use of dude nipples in the bedroom.
I went bandying about the internet to find some kinda of data about it and found nothing. All I found was a bunch of oddly worded questions on sites like Yahoo! Answers and poorly misconceived sex advice with nothing to back it up from wrote magazines like Cosmopolitan. I don’t mean to pick on Cosmo… no, actually, I do. Anytime I read or hear of their advice I immediately start to wonder if the author has ever even had sex. When the advice is solicited from readers, I always feel like they didn’t actually get advice from reader, but rather invented people and applied advice that they thought would generate sale.
That being said, whether we’re talking advice from rubes or just talking with friends, I only tend to hear one of two things. The first is something along the lines of, “Fuck no, don’t touch my nipples at all”. The second is, “Oh yeah, I really love that”. I rarely hear my own stance on it, which I think is actually fairly new to me. My previous stance was also rare to hear. Previously, it was, “Um… okay, if you want to. I’m not bothered”. My new stance is, “It’s kinda fun, yeah. Let’s do this”. I imagine that I’ll stay right around there or, maybe, join the category if guys that really love it. Right now I don’t love it. I don’t hate it. I kinda dig it.
But I feel like this is something that merits more research. Unfortunately, the only real “research” I can offer right now is basically scouring the internet for data sources, and anything datawise that is sex related get almost immediately buried under the trillions of pounds of websites and pages that are either highly opinionated with little to no actual information or porn. Every now and then you’ll find a news story about a subject, but even then you usually only get a stylized version of the study’s conclusion, not the study itself. This is something that troubles me, because it seems commonplace these days to float out a news story as completely factual and without interpretation but without anything to back it up. I mean… fuckin’ link me to the study itself. Whatever happened to citing your sources? I should say – I’m troubled by this because it seems to be happening with all types of subjects, not just sexy-time-advice. The sexy-time-advice is just the latest thing agitate this old sore.
Back to the man nips. Unfortunately for now all I can offer is to be another site that has nothing to back it up. I’m going to look into it again. For now, here’s my stance: Like with all things in the bedroom, some people like it and some people don’t. Quit putting everyone in a box.
tl;dr – Man Nips: Do You Like Them Messed With – I got nothin’, but I’m looking into it.
This was a pretty shitty post. Sorry, I’m padding for something more substantial that I’m working on now and should put out in a couple weeks. Here’s to hoping you dig that. But hey, did you get a load of today’s featured picture? I mean… what’s up with that? Are people actually that stupid or are they just trolling wiki answers?