Remember that routine I talked about getting back into?

Yeah, it’s a real bitch.  I’ve been working on it, but it isn’t easy.

Here’s a quick recap.  Back in the day, I used to have a pretty good “routine”.  I’d get up in the morning, take care of some personal business and hygiene, and do some exercise.  This routine stemmed from my time in the Air Force, where I would start my day much the same but start it earlier.  I would alternate days of working out at home before work or heading to work for group PT (physical training).  In both cases, after work would either be some kind of physical activity, hanging out with friends, cooking a healthy meal and relaxing, or just spending some time outside.  I may or may not watch some TV or play a video game and I’d usually read before bed.  There isn’t anything miraculous about how I handled my days, but it was at least fairly healthy and worked.  It wasn’t even planned, at first, it just kind of worked as is.  Eventually, some shit happened and I lost my routine.  I’ve tried to get it back, but have mostly failed.  Shit got better, shit got worse, shit got about even but not good, blah blah.  I’m pretty sure I have already written about it more than I ever needed to, so if you’re actually interested in this aspect of my life, just use the handy search.  It’s right over… there ->?  It used to be… I should jack with the interface again.

A big part of the recent failings has been my own complete inability to just get the fuck up in the morning.  A combination of some mild insomnia, lack of motivation, and an all-around bad attitude toward avoiding bad decisions have… well, I mean, I am surely to blame for this.  That being said, quite a few friends and family members have mentioned going through similar issues.  Like it’s “a phase” or whatever.  I’d usually blow off their comment and be all, “sure”.  Thing is… they’ve also all talked about getting to an age where they just couldn’t sleep in anymore.  And now guess what?  I can’t sleep in anymore.  It doesn’t matter if it’s a no-shower Sunday where I just got to bed at 3 AM and have nothing planned.  It doesn’t matter if it’s a holiday.  It doesn’t matter if I had been drinking, partying, video gaming, lap-dance-receiving all night long.  I could be hung over to all or still exhausted from a previous long day’s work.  It kind of doesn’t matter anymore: I will be awake no later than 7 AM.  That’s just happening.  I’ve actually started waking up around 5 AM, without an alarm, on a fairly regular basis.  And there’s no, “Whatever, I’ll just turn over and pull the sheets over my eyes and go back to sleep.”  Nah, dudes.  I’m awake.  And I will just get the fuck up out of bed and go do something.

Yesterday morning I got out of bed at 5:30.  I washed a dish I’d neglected the night before, ironed a few shirts, made breakfast, and then fucked around on the internet until I felt like showering.  I got shit done.  Relatively important (if mundane) personal shit.  I got it done without even thinking about it and did so because I was up already and might as well and, shit, I was kinda bored anyway.  This really leads me to believe that my friends and family just might have been correct all of that time.  It kinda sucks but, at the same time, it kinda doesn’t.  And hey, maybe it will help me get into that good routine again.

But now I have a new hurdle: I’m slowing down.  I know that this is a natural part of aging and all, but fuck.  It wasn’t long ago that I could shit, smirk, shave, shower, make AND EAT breakfast at home, and maybe even do some other shit in just over half an hour.  Nowadays, I feel like it takes me half an hour just to shower and get myself dressed.  On top of that, I have to deal with a new thing where my shitty self just doesn’t even want to do anything for the first fifteen to twenty minutes after I roll my fat ass off of my mattress.  Holy fuck.  I really hope that losing some weight will speed me up some, because this is pretty fuckin’ ridiculous.

Anyway, right now I’m falling back on an old trick I would do for training and deployment days.  Everything that I would need to get out of the door the next morning would be together, ready, and right where I needed it the night before.  This means:

  1. Pick out my outfit for the next day, put it all on a single hanger, and hang it in the bathroom
  2. Choose my breakfast, put all of the ingredients (if it’s that involved) in one place and whatever fry pan or whateve’s ready to go
  3. Lunch (if I’m bringing it) is made and in some ready-to-go bag or whatever.
  4. Stuff I need for work is in my go-to back pack and by the door
  5. Keys and shoes are by my jackets
  6. iTunes is up and (hopefully) ready to sync
  7. Work email is up for any last-minute “hey, when are my meetings today” bullshit

Now all I have to do is figure out how to better plan for the kinds of shitty weather that fuck with my commute.  I have an extremely short commute.  Like sub-ten-minutes short.  But if I time it wrong or there’s some kind of weather, it can magically take over twenty.  Honestly, traffic times are on a short list of things that just straight up confound me.  That’s not to say that I get everything.  Read a few past entries – clearly, I don’t understand much.  But traffic patterns make zero fucking sense to me.  How can it take me twenty minutes to drive – drive – five miles?  I don’t even live in a major metropolitan area!!!  Oh, and don’t even get me started on the way that traffic grinds to a halt at the mere threat of snow.  Fuckfaces.

tl;dr – Slowly getting into that good routine I keep bitching about missing, thanks in kind to nature… apparently.  Still a few kinks to work out, but I think I’m getting there.  Feel free to crib off of my list.  Suggestions are welcome.

You know, whenever I post shit like this, I always feel like a rube.  Like every other person who reads this is going, “Really?  You just now figured that out?  You’re a fuckin’ dumbass.”  Then again, I know a lot of people who are older than me and haven’t even figured it out as little as I have, so… fffft… does that even mean anything?

But while we’re on the subject and wondering if you’ve already got it figure out, I’m open to tips.  What gets you out of bed and to work on time every time without feeling overly rushed or forcing you to skip shit?  What’s part of your routine?  What up with them jugs?  Does anyone else feel kinda sick for the first five minutes?