I hope you’re enjoying my blog, I’d like to catch up on yours…

But no, really.  I have a few blogs that I really enjoy reading (or listening to, viewing, etc.’ing them, as some of them aren’t the “written word” kind of thang).  I really enjoy them but haven’t really been able to sink my teeth (my brain teeth) into them.  It’s a real shame, because it seems like a few of you have been updated a lot more often than you did back when I had a shitload of time.  Also – the little I have checked out appears to be of high interest and/or high quality.  That’s pretty fuckin’ cool, so kudos to you fellas and ladies.  If you happen to read this, expect some later interactions from this guy when I get around to checking you… um… up.

Chances are pretty good that I’ll start checking them out more in a few weeks.  Chances are great that I’ll be checking them out a lot more by Thanksgiving(ish).  I decided a few months ago that I am not going to replace my laptop.  At least not this round.  Let me talk a little bit about budgeting.  If you are an adult and don’t budget at all, you are behind.  You need to budget.  Unless you’re balls rich, and even then you probably should.

I’m not saying that you need to plan out every dollar, though it’s not a bad idea… and it sounds pretty appealing to me.  Rather, I’m saying that you need to do at least two things.  1) Have a general idea of your spending habits and be reasonably certain that you are living within your means and 2) Have at least one financial goal and be reasonably certain that you can achieve it in a reasonable time frame.  It would be better if you took it a step further and actually tracked and planned how each paycheck should be broken down, and it’s so fucking easy these days.

Yes, it’s probably true that we are probably slaves to the dollar and by extension the banks and creditors.  It’s true that most of us are “The 99%” and most of us (self included) aren’t the 1% elite and we don’t work on Wall Street OR Main Street.  We work on a side street and either live just down the road or deal with a horrendous commute, just so we can have a nice place to escape from our shitty lives for a few hours each day.  A lot of us don’t want to “play the game”, but we are in the game, whether we like it or not.  It is possible to completely disconnect from the game, but at that point, you probably aren’t reading any blogs, and certainly not this one.  So for people reading this, your only other choices are to either play this shitty game or to let the game play you.  An easy-assed way to play the game and not get completely fucked by it is to budget.  Believe it or not, the banks that own us have put out great, easy-to-use tools to help us set up and deal with that budget.  If you are willing to budget and track your shit, those banks might even help you out.  Why?  Because they are only interested in their own profit.  That’s a shitty way to be (in my opinion), but if you know that, then you can use that.  If you budget well enough, you’ll end up with an itty-bitty money pile.  You can go to a bunch of banks and start talking investment with them.  Some of them are just trying to take your money and never give it back, and after you talk to a few banks, you should be able to spot the horrible ones pretty quickly.  Some of those banks are absolutely going to help you.  They will help because they aren’t being shady or shitty about their driving desire – profit.  If you invest through them, your ability to make money will also make money for them.  So yes, they want to help you make them money.

I am fucking rambling.  I rambled my ass off in my Gut Loss episode I just recorded – I guess I’m just in that mood.  What was my point?  OH – Learn to fucking budget.  A few years ago, I had next to no fucking money and I was stupid broke because I didn’t know how to stretch my dollar.  I’m not making bank these days, but I live pretty well.  Even though I’m a single income household in a duel income economy and don’t make a lot in the first place, I do alright.  Because I’m budgeting.  I own a condo, I bought a brand new BIGASS car, I replaced some critical and NOT cheap computer components, I replaced an XBox 360 with the fancy new one, I can spend money on home repairs, I can splurge every now and the.  It’s ALL because I keep the fuck track of my money.  And because I keep track of my money, that informs my decisions for my money.  I have to look hard at any purchase greater than $20.  Well… not $20… I at least think twice about $20, think pretty hard about $50, and definitely think real hard about $100.  And yeah – I totally budgeted for my trip to a strip club the other week.  I said “Here’s a chunk of entertainment budget that I am cool with using on having a stranger’s ass, tits, and pussy in my face and rubbed on my dick”.

Do NOT put a black light to that pair of jeans, inside OR out.

What does this have to do with a tablet?  I could buy an iPad 2 today.  I’m not going to.  It’s not in my budget, especially since I had to replace some computer parts.  But some of the first things I started budgeting for were electronics.  At some point, laptops became truly great tools.  I was probably late at jumping on them, but I didn’t miss them at the time.  My laptop was a  pretty-powerful-at-the-time refurbished joint that I got for dirt cheap.  Before deciding to buy, I realized that it wasn’t going to last.  For one, I knew I had to either buy a new desktop or fix up the one I had to handle the demands I had for it (recording, rendering, video games, blah blah blah).  On top of that, computers don’t stay useful as long as other household items.  Yes – in the modern home, a computer is a household item.  It isn’t just a porn searching toy.  It’s a way to pay bills, research shit, meal plan, FUCKING BUDGET, and all types of other shit.  You fucking need one.  I need two.  Okay, I don’t need two… but I fuckin’ need two, stop askin’.  Mind your fuckin’ business.

But I really don’t need two.  After getting a smart phone and realizing just how fucking amazing they are and just how incredible of a tool them can be, I really don’t need a second computer.  Instead, I’m reasonably certain that the best replacement for this laptop is actually a tablet.  It would actually fit my needs and desires a lot more than a laptop does.  My desktop handles FUCKING EVERYTHING that I could possibly need to do on a computer-assed-computer.  If my laptop is a work horse then my desktop is a FUCKING WAR HORSE.  BITCHES.  Everything else I could do on the race horse that would be a tablet, and probably do them better.  You know what I do when I find a new recipe online right now?  I write it on a fucking legal pad, tear the page off, and bring that piece of paper with me into the kitchen.  I live in the fucking future where large sections of population walk around with a fucking device the beats the shit of a Star Trek Tricorder, and I’m sloppily jotting down recipes and shopping lists on note paper.  The fuck?  If I want/need information on something I’m watching or am looking for a game guide, I look that shit up on my iPhone and just DESTROY my fucking eyes trying to read it on that tiny screen.  The laptop is too cumbersome to just go room-to-room while I’m readin’ m’blogs or reviewin’ some work shit or half-assed answering an email or dickin’ around on reddit or whatever the fuck else reason I bought the damn laptop for in the damn first place damnit.

A tablet would be better at those things AND it would be easier to take it on the road with me AND it would help me with my whole music discovery thing AND I think it would make a better soundboard (a.k.a. Instant Replay) than this laptop is.  And I’ll be able to catch up with ya’ll’s fuckin’ blogs while I’m at my diner table, on my balcony, or half-ignoring a TV show in the background.  I can afford one now.  Even the most expensive one.  However, I actually think one of the cheaper (though still premium) ones would suit me better.  Jackie from 3 Guys Walk Into a Bar and TwinkieBeyond fame has a 7″ Galaxy Tab.  I heard those were good before they even came out, but they seemed a bit small for me.  Now that I’ve actually laid hands on a few and seen a person use it on a regular, I’m thinking they might be just the right size for me.  I’m going to make sure that I’ll be happy with my purchase before I make it, double-check that I’m not just bullshitting myself about my budget, and then play the waiting game… Ah, the waiting game sucks, let’s go out and buy one today! NO, NO, NO, NO!!!.  I’ll keep an eye and an ear out for a good deal.  Whether I craigslist it up or just get my druthers up to hit up a Black Friday thing, you can be sure of this – I won’t be paying full price for whatever tablet I end up deciding on.  FUCKIN’-A, I’M RAMBLING!!!

tl;dr – took a really long way to make my point that I’m going to buy a tablet and get back to reading people’s blogs, didn’t I?

Although… I’m not sure how I’ll handle my porn habits between that War Horse Desktop and my Race Horse Tablet…  do I jack it with the tablet?  That seems… kinda gross.  I’m not really sure why, I just know that it seems like it would be kinda groady.  Thoughts?

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