Hey, look at me – all writin’ this shit the day before like I keep telling myself I’m going to do but never actually do and NOW I’M ACTUALLY DOING IT!!!
While it has certainly had its moments of totally sucking and being shitty, I have generally found my job enjoyable. It offers pocket victories that I can find rewarding and provides a career framing that I didn’t really sign up for, but now find pretty important for my own future. I hate to admit it, but the chances of me getting back to a Physics degree gets slimmer by the day. On the other hand, my chances of going to college for anything actually improve a bit from month to month. Mostly because of my budgeting. There are basically three obstacles to me at least taking night classes, but that’s for another time (if I haven’t already discussed it, that is). Not for today’s post.
Lately my job has been very frustrating and a bit disappointing. My work load and responsibilities have been steadily on the rise for the past few years. Each month, I’d get some new thing to do or keep track of added to whatever I was already doing. For the most part, it would be things that pertain directly to my job and wouldn’t involve anything that’s too batshit crazy. Over the past few months, that rate has increased to weekly with a week here or there that I’d get new shit pretty much daily. Less and less of it has anything to do with my main, core job. Instead it has to do with some other company shit or stuff that I perceived as someone else’s responsibilities. As it is right now, my workload is a bit too much. I’m not terribly fretting it because the two things that are currently really fucking my time over are temporary. The first is a pretty big event planned for about a week-and-a-half from now (OH FUCK!). It’s basically just a week-long, cross department, brainstorming on steroids meeting used to break down a process, identify its issues, and fix them. And I mean really fucking fix them, mostly because you finally have the people and higher-up attention that you need to actually make changes and not just propose them. It is a serious time suck and I sometimes feel like there is no way I can get all of the pre-work done before the event starts. I was already at the point of taking select work home with me when…
The second thing happened, where someone in my department is being sent to a new position in another department. Our department will be getting a replacement – someone who has already done the job and did an awesome job at it, so I’m not totally stressed about it. The problem is that both the outgoing and incoming members are in some strange “transition limbo” where they can’t really jump right into their new jobs but also can’t really devote much time to the jobs they are leaving. So the work that the outgoing member of my department was doing is now being done by me. This guy. Guy with not enough time. I can’t – and I really mean this – possibly blame the job-swapping employees. Neither of them directly asked for this job and neither of them is holding back on making the changes happen. Instead, we’re all being fucked by what appears to be a change made on a whim with basically zero planning put into it. What a fucking pain.
To be fair, I’m not actually too busy. I mean, I half-ass it through lunch (although I should really just take a full lunch) and I occasionally find “fuck around on the web” time. It’s more of the burn-out factor and the stress of thinking I’m letting things slip. I have so many projects going on but I really need to put all of the time I can find into this big event thing. At the same time, I’m supposed to retrain the incoming person, keep up with the day-to-day work that both myself and the outgoing person handle, support testing, support the two other people in the department, and keep up with the other non-job bullshit I’ve been tasked to do. It’s just too much. I shouldn’t be expected to work a 9 hour day or take work home with me.
On top of all of the extra work, our department is now under the third (technically fourth) manager since the start of the year and the last two spent a lot of time talking about how nothing is changing right before they change fucking everything they can try to. It’s pretty much fucking bullshit, but I guess… first world problems, right?
tl;dr – Shit sucks and some bosses love to work to make it shittier. Fuck everything about it.
I have really got to piss right now. I got a new video game today – Rage. It’s now almost 11 PM and I really don’t think I should stay up to give it a try. Maybe I’ll just play a little…