Sex Chart Theme Week – Day 4

Today:  Dating age range.

Much to my chagrin, the fact is that age really does matter.  Maybe not in everything, but certainly in dating and sex.  Actually, I would argue that age matters more in dating than in sex.  Or rather, a serious or at least semi-serious relationship (especially if it also includes sex) has more dependence on the age and age difference of its members than in a one night stand or purely sex-based relationship.  As far as I’m concerned, the only age consideration for one night stands is “legal”.  If both people are of legal age to be knocking boots, then whatever.  If they’re both underage… you know, that’s really just not my problem.

I don’t know if he came up with it himself, grew up hearing it, or learned it from the internet, but Jackie of Pragmatic Asshole has proposed a formula.  At first, I just found the notion funny.  Then I thought about it.  Then I graphed it.  It works great, except at the extremes.  Here it is:

Blue Line – The youngest you can date is the sum of seven and half of your age. 7 + (y/2) = x

Plug your age into “y”, and lowest you can date pops out at “x”.  This is simple Simon stuff, so if you’re already lost, just go to the graph.  Maybe they’ll cover it in next year’s Math class.

The inverse works nicely to figure out your top end (if you’re into cougars or silver foxes, which you are).

Red Line – The oldest you can date is twice the difference of your age and seven. 2(y-7) = x

Savvy?  Just look at the graph.

Age ain't nothin' but a thang, little lady

I included the edges so you can check out where it falls apart.  It works really nicely from teenage to over-the-hill.  Half of 14 is seven.  Add seven.  You get 14!  You should be dating your own age at that age!  Brilliant!  Of course… it’s more fun not to, but I ain’t gunna tell you how to live.  One year younger and the formula gets busted.  It shows that the youngest a 13 year old can date is… 13 1/2?  What?  The youngest they can date is slightly older then them?  That’s why it should start at 14 and not younger.

If you’re 60, you can date as young as 37.  Some may find this gross, but we have plenty of 70 year olds dating or “dating” 20-somethings in art, entertainment, and politics that few people bat an eyelash at, so do as you does.  You can never date someone who is literally half your age (’cause of plus seven), but it still gets weirder as you get older.  Notice that I included all the way up to about 150 in the graph.  That’s because the top-end for an 80 years old (by the formula) is 146.  Assuming that someone lives that long with our current status of aging, I don’t think either of them are dating.  It’s really fuckin’ strange, but I’m not so sure anyone would say anything if it actually happened.

The age range widens as you get older, and I think that part makes the most sense.  Think about it – a 20 year old dating a 17 year old is a little strange (not that I ever… did… that…), but you can see it happening.  A 20 year old dating a 16 year old?  That’s fucked up.  That’s a whole four years!  A 24 year old dating a 20 year old sounds perfectly fine, though.  I mean, c’mon dudes, that’s only four years.  The strangeness opens and closes at a few more points in my opinion.  A mid-30’s person dating a mid-to-late-20something is  a little odd, but mostly fine.  A 28 year old dating a 21 year old is more odd.

Gender is also a factor, though less and less these days.  I’ll say now what I said yesterday – I don’t have any facts to back this up.  Just anecdotal evidence, but think this one through with me – which are you more likely to expect in a heterosexual couple?  A 30 year old man with a 25 year old woman, or a 30 year old woman with a 25 year old man?  Don’t bullshit yourself, you know it’s the couple with the older man.  This may just be perception, but perception is a major factor in this situation.

I don’t know, maybe that’s just me.  What do you think?

tl;dr – date a young chick? Fuck yeah!

I’ve fooled around with a few cougars, myself.  I gotta admit, they were a lot of fun.