Pretty Happy ‘Bout This

Twenty Pounds.  That’s 9,071.8474 grams.  1.4 Stone for Brits across ye oldde pond.  320 Ounces for… people who use ounces.

I’m down 20 lbs since getting more serious about getting rid of my shitty fat gut and my extremely upsetting man-boobs. I’m pretty happy about that.  It means that what I’m doing is working.  It also means I can’t fuck up and have another “bad weekend” or it’s all for not.

Sadly, I don’t really feel like it’s showing… but maybe I’m having some mild body dysmorphic disorder going on, but  It’s more likely that it just has’t been enough to show.  I think that weight fluctuations are easier to spot the thinner you are.  I wonder if that’s why so many people that I consider “in shape” don’t think so of themselves.  I was in front of a small gathering of co-workers including my boss, bosses-boss, and bosses-bosses-boss yesterday and it was an issue.  The back of the room is all plate glass windows.  I kept seeing my reflection in them, and I did not like it.  I was trying not to see it, because every time I looked, all I could think was “Man.  Look as those moobs and that belly.  What a piece of shit.”  Really fucked with me.

I know that another twenty pounds will show, even to myself.  As my own harshest critic, it would be nice to rub it in my own face.  Something about that last line seems really wrong, but until I get a clone or meet up with an alternate universe Aaron, I don’t think I’ll be having any problems.  It will also considerably increase my chances of living forever, which I think might be pretty fun.  But that’s for another time.

It was about five months ago that I “started”, but I fucked up early and didn’t start really trying until around the end of February.  The time frame only matters in that it was pretty quick.  This makes me believe that these twenty pounds are mostly fluff.  Something like “Top Fat”.  Filler from very bad health practices like drinking a shitload, having greasy crap food, and not exercising for an entire weekend.  The type of extra baggage that people who always manage to maintain themselves never run into.  But it still counts.

tl;dr – I’ve lost 20 pounds, it’s not enough, but I’m still working at it.

I should post some more hand drawn titties.


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