In case it hasn’t yet become apparent, I’m a pretty big fan of knockin’ boots. It’s pretty high on my list of things that I enjoy doing. It would also be on my Doomsday Bucket List… which I should post here some day. It isn’t on my mind as often as it may seem, but I do think about it a lot. I’d admit to being a bit obsessed, but it’s one of the few things that I enjoy in life, so let’s just run with it.
When describing the things that I enjoy in bed, one might describe me as a degenerate. I guess that might be so, but know that there are a lot of things that I am not into. Some things really gross me out (gaping. ew.), but that’s for another post. Today I’ll give you my top five favorite sexual things. And yeah, I’ll be explicit.
Aaron’s Top 5 Favoritest Sexual Sex Havings:
3. Eating pussy
2. Facing each other on a chair
1. Um… Missionary?
Believe me, I’m just as surprised as you are. As much as I talk about buttsex, you’d think it would be the top seed for me. It’s not. I do really like it. I don’t need it. I also don’t need a BJ. In fact, my list also works as “Hardest Sex Things To Give Up”. Were I to go monogamous, I would still want sex on a regular. I wouldn’t expect regular blowjobs and I suspect that if I got the buttlove at all, it would be my birthday and maybe Christmas. ‘Cause buttsex on Jesus’ birthday is where it’s at. And yeah, I would like to bang the bottom on a regular basis, but it’s just not that big of a deal. I couldn’t give up normal sex. Vagina. Los Pussy, or whatever. And yeah, I did pick the holiest of holies twice, and neither of them were doggy. Twice because it really is the best, and no doggy because that position doesn’t really do anything for me. I’d like to do it every now and then, but it isn’t in my regular rotation and I can ditch it if I gotta. I like the standing version a whole lot, but even that doesn’t make top 5. Maybe top ten… hmm. 6- Reverse Cowgirl. 7- different anal position. 8- lickin’ booty (gotta be careful. hepatitis is a bitch). 9- “Downward Dog” 10- Side by side?
Eating pussy (and maybe ass… ‘titis) would also be difficult to give up. I understand how that must sound, and it’s going to sound a whole lot more like that. I’m not bragging and I’m not trying to appear selfless or am somehow Don Juan. It’s not like I’m doing it exclusively for her. I do it because I get something out of knocking her socks off. A sense of accomplishment. A sense of being desired and sexy. Winning. I can consistently get A+ reactions giving oral. When I really knock it out of the park, I know it. I wanna high-five, take a shower, have a sandwich, and we can both sleep it off happily. Plus, if I do a good job there, I can kind of phone it in with the actual sex and she may not even notice.
If you want to enjoy sex more, I’d suggest you let yourself enjoy your partner’s enjoyment. That’s so touchy-feely and pop-psy that just writing that makes my skin crawl. But really. Drift into the radness of gettin’ it on.